No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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