just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
