oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
