Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
You've changed since you got that strap on
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