she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
