i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
At least life still wants to fuck me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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