so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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