Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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