he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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