...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize