it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
