are you still at the devil's house?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You are a genius and a whore.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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