Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
