Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
