you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
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