Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
