I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize