Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize