I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
