I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
