Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
