Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
