When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
