What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
