Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize