Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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