He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
