I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
