she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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