You work out of a Hotel?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
