tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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