Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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