SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
foreskin is a definite game changer
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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