Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
