Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
