New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I have tasted many bathrooms
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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