So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I want to fling myself into the sun
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize