i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Randomize
