Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
