i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
As shirtless as possible
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
