we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
