So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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