How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I forgot how hot balto sounded
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
