Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
