Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Damn victory sex feels great
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
