what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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