mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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