Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
My penis needs a shock collar
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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