i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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