Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
she looked like the before picture.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
