I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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