Non-Jews are for practice
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize