So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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