i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
